


drunk in love

by wakawakah



Category: Blindspot (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-19
Updated: 2018-01-27
Packaged: 2019-03-06 23:44:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13422150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wakawakah/pseuds/wakawakah
Summary: getting blackout drunk was never the plan, but neither was confessing her crush on her best friend





	1. say it

**Author's Note:**

> so this is the first work I've published ever, so be nice on me :)

When Tasha woke up, her head was spinning. She slowly opened her eyes and carefully looked around her and she was met by the sun beaming at her through the window of her bedroom. 

She felt nauseas and her head was killing her. Why didn’t she close the blinders before she went to bed? The merciless bright sun, which normally would be a welcome sight in the morning (since it equaled getting to sleep in, for once) now felt like a curse. She closed her eyes again in a desperate attempt to easy her headache. God, she was getting to old for this. Although, getting blackout drunk had not been the plan when she went out last night. 

Reade had invited her to join him and Sarah and a few of Sarah’s friends at the bar. Apparently they thought that one of her friends would be perfect for Tasha and that she absolutely had to join them and meet her. Reade had been on her for weeks about at least trying to meet someone, to go on a few dates. He even offered her to set up a tinder account for her after she had complained about how everyone she knew suddenly were in serious relationship and how boring everyone has become. 

She had hesitated - she wasn’t exactly up for meeting someone but she hadn’t have the time to tell her best friend why yet. Or rather, she hadn’t have the courage to hell him why. They were usually always open about what was going on in their lives when it came to relationships and dating. But this time it was different. Because this time it wasn't about some girl that she met at the bar around the corner and went on a couple of dates with just to end up never seeing her again. It was worse. And it was unfitting, because this time, she had a huge crush on her best friend. She had tried to tell herself that her crush on Patterson would pass, that it wasn’t even a real crush. Because those things happens right? When you spend so much time with someone and become so close to them that you develop some kind of imaginary crush. So it was totally not a real crush. It was not like she stood a chance anyway, the blonde was way out of her league. She was incredibly smart and beautiful. And definitely straight. Not that it matters though, since she’s not interested in anything more than friendship with the beautiful blonde. 

Tasha groaned as she turned around and put her face into the pillow. Her phone buzzed and she lazily moved her arm towards the nightstand where she knows it’ll be - out of old habit. She squints at the light up screen and sighs as she reads the text.

(10:48 AM) Edgar Reade

How are you feeling today? You alive?

She sent him a quick reply stating the yes she was alive, but what the fuck actually happened last night and how could he let her drink that much. She decided to check the rest of her notifications and when she starts to scroll she panics at the sight. 

(7) Missed Calls from Patterson  
(2) Missed Calls from Edgar Reade 

(1:03 AM) Patterson

Let me know when you get home, alright?

(1:32 AM) Patterson

Are you home yet?

(1:40 AM) Patterson

Tasha?

(1:48 AM) Patterson

Tasha please answer

(2:04 AM) Patterson 

NATASHA ZAPATA ANSWER YOUR PHONE. PLEASE.

(2.35 AM) Patterson

Okay. Call me when you wake up, alright? I need to know  
that you’re okay.

(2.35 AM) Patterson

And we probably should talk about last night

 

Oh shit. There was no way in hell that this could be good. Her heart rate increased at the sight of Patterson’s name on the screen. Did she call the blonde last night? Because she was not at the party was she? No she definitely wasn’t, she would have remembered that. Oh god, what if she told her about her feelings. Then she was screwed. She didn’t want to ruin their friendship. Because that was most certainly going to be the outcome if Patterson found out she had feelings for her. Tasha felt sick at just the thought of it, or maybe it was because she was hungover. Probably both. 

Before Tasha even had the time to debate whether she should call the blonde or not her phone went buzzing again and of course, Patterson’s name showed up on the display. Tasha stared at it. She was not ready to talk with her yet, not before she remembered what she told her friend in her drunken state. 

The phone continued buzzing and she just kept staring at it. What if Patterson was mad at her? Maybe she had already screwed up. Anxiety began to run through spine. She closed her eyes and then answered the call. Could it be worse?

”Hi”

”Tasha? Are you okay?” Patterson’s voice filled the silence of her bedroom. ”Do you have any idea how worried I’ve been?” 

She sounded tired and her voice was shaky, like she was on the verge of crying. Tasha immediately felt guilty for making the blonde feeling that way. Knowing Patterson, she had probably been up all night worrying. It bothered her that she couldn’t even remember whatever happened last night. 

”I’m sorry Patterson” her voice was raspy and her throat felt dry. She let out a cough before she continued. ”But yeah I’m okay. I just woke up. I’m sorry I scared you”

”Did you get home alright?” she could her the blonde let out a sigh of relief but worry was still in her voice.

”It seems that way” Tasha stated ”last night is still kind of.. blurry” 

Patterson didn’t answer for a while and Tasha began to wonder if she had hung up on her. But then the blonde spoke up again.

”Are you in the mood for breakfast? I’m coming over”


	2. about last night

As Patterson stood inside her and Tasha’s go-to coffee place, waiting for their usual orders, a double shot vanilla latte for her and a almond macchiato for the brunette, she began to wonder if this was a good idea at all. What was she going to do, confront Tasha about her drunken slur? 

Did her best friend even remember anything? Maybe it was for the best if she didn’t. 

She had spent the Friday night on her couch, catching up on the latest episodes of Games of Thrones. Like usual, it had been a busy couple of weeks so she was happy to finally settling down and enjoy a glass of wine. 

When she checked her phone to see that it was already past midnight she turned of the TV and brought the dishes to the sink, leaving it for tomorrow. She was too tired to take care of it now anyway. It was when she was in the middle of brushing her teeth that she could hear her phone ring. She quickly spit out the toothpaste and went back into the living room, figuring if someone called at this time, it must be important. 

She smiled when she read the name on the screen - Tasha. 

”Tasha, what’s up” 

”Patterson? Heyy, am I bothering you? I hope not cuz’ I wanna, No, I need to talk with you” Tasha was drunk and Patterson found it quite endearing that she had called her. 

”Of course you’re not, what’s on your mind?” 

”Okay so, this was a really bad idea. Like super bad. Reade is making me meet this chick that he thinks is my type and I should give a chance and all that. But like, he doesn’t know, you know? He doesn’t know why I don’t want to. Like, she’s super pretty and all. And she’s nice” Tasha rambled on and then abruptly stopped. 

Patterson found herself getting hit by a sense of jealousy. She had no right to be jealous. But she was. And what did Tasha mean with ’he doesn’t know’, was she supposed to know? Did Tasha meet someone and she was too oblivious to know it? 

”What is it that Reade doesn’t know, Tasha?” 

”I don’t wanna meet anyone you know. I think I’m.. I-” Tasha stopped speaking again. She sounded confused, like she was not sure if she had decided whether she was going to say whatever it was the she was supposed to say. And of course, the drunken mind of the brunette did not work very fast. ”Patterson. It’s useless to try and date some random chick when you’re like all the way positive that you love someone”

At that Patterson froze. Even though the slur in her voice were evident, the message seemed sincere. So she had met someone. Her heart sank. Of course the brunette would’ve met someone, why wouldn’t she. Tasha was one of the most beautiful people she knew, and she was funny and charming and.. perfect. Sh

”Oh, that’s nice, that’s- that’s great Tasha. Do I know who it is?” she tried to sound happy for her friend even though inside, she felt like she just had her heart ripped out.

Tasha laughed. It was a heartwarming sound that brought a sad smile to her face despite the news. Her laugh were one of Patterson’s favorite things about the woman, it had always been. 

”You know, I really really really need to tell you something. Like it’s super important” she tried to sound serious, trying to make her point. ”You can not tell anyone, promise me that Patterson. Like, not even Reade cuz’ Reade will kill me”

”I promise, I won’t tell anyone” She tried to sound calm, but inside, Patterson was starting to freak out, what if it was Sarah. Then Tasha was definitely screwed. No definitely not. But what if it actually was Reade? She knew that was most likely impossible but her mind was starting playing games on her and suddenly everything started to seem possible. The two of them were close after all and sometimes she couldn't help but envy the man who had known Tasha for so long and always seemed to make laugh. 

”You know, I really shouldn’t tell you this, it’s a baaaad idea and I’m like a 110 % sure I’m gonna regret this like the second after I tell you this.”

The line went silent again. Patterson began to worry that the brunette had hung up on her.

”You have to promise to not get mad, alright”

”Tasha..?”

”Please Patterson, promise me” 

”I promise Tasha, now will you tell me who it is?” 

"You know, I'm kinda surprised you haven't figured it out yet. Cuz' you're like definitely the smartest person I know"

"Well, is it someone I know about?" Patterson began to feel a little irritated. Even if she didn't know who said person was yet, she already felt a dislike towards them. She just wished Tasha would tell her, rip the bandaid of. 

"Yeaah, you could say that" she chuckled again. 

"Tasha.."

”Don’t you get it? It’s you. It’s always been you, silly” 

If Patterson was starting to freak out before, it was nothing compared to how she handled this confession. Did Tasha just confess that she liked her, that she was in love with her? Because it sure seemed that way, if she was not dreaming. For a second, she debated whether she should pinch herself, but soon neglected the thought. It

Before she had the chance to answer the brunette, another voice appeared on the phone.

”Patterson is that you?” it was Reade. ”Damn I don’t know how our friend here even managed to get this drunk. I’ve been looking for her forever. She just sneaked out on saying she was going to make a call but that was a good 40 minutes ago” 

”Hey, Reade. How is she doing?” she could hear her friend sighing heavily and fumbling around with something in the backgrounded before he answered. ”Yeah, I think so. I’m going to get her a cab now before God knows what happens. Good night Patterson” 

And with that the call was ended and Patterson was left with the silence of her dark apartment and her mind spinning with the brunette’s confession. This certainly would change everything. 

 

The sound of the doorbell startled Tasha who was still laying in bed, lazily scrolling through her Twitter feed as she waited for Patterson to arrive. She would lie if she didn’t say she was nervous, the blonde coming over with breakfast was something that occurred from time to time, especially when she knew Tasha was hungover in bed after a night out. But something in her tone made Tasha aware of that something was obviously bothering Patterson. 

She hurried out of bed and put on the first t-shirt she could find and threw a quick glance at the mirror on the way out of her bedroom. What caught her eye were the print on the shirt. Dungeon & Dragons was printed across the chest. Of fucking course she managed to pick the one shirt that Patterson must’ve forgotten at her place after one of their many sleepovers. Which were also a recurring thing in their friendship, that started when Patterson dealt with the death of both David and Borden in such a short period of time, she developed sleeping issues. 

After one night mentioning that she didn’t feel safe in her own apartment and how alone she felt there, Tasha offered her friend to stay over at her place for as long as she needed to. Days turned into weeks which later turned into months. And it was a rough couple of months, soothing Patterson’s hysterical sobs nearly night and watch her twist and turn in her sleep because of the nightmares. It took a toll on her, seeing her best friend in so much pain. 

Thinking about it, Tasha realized that it was during this period that she began to see Patterson as something more than just a friend. She wanted to fall asleep with the blonde in her arms every night but it killed her knowing why her kept coming back and that her feelings would never be returned. She wanted to protect her from heartbreak and be the reason behind her dorky but beautiful smile. 

As she saw her image in the mirror again, she cringed. Would she find it weird that she wore her shirt? After all, Tasha still didn’t know if things had changed between them after last nights call. She decided to leave it on after all and went to open the door. 

She let out a shaky breathe before she opened the door and Patterson’s figure appeared.


	3. the end

”Hi” 

”Hey”

Tasha observed her worn out expression. The circles under her eyes were evident and her hair up in a messy bun. This was not a common sight. The usually always put-together and well dressed woman now accompanied the messy bun with an old college hoodie and a pair of washed out black jeans. To her, the blonde still looked absolutely stunning. Hell, she could wear anything and still be the most beautiful person in the room.

They stood in silence for a while, both of them waiting for the other one to make a move. As Tasha looked up, her eyes caught Patterson’s blue orbs. The blonde just stood there, leaning against the doorframe observing her, and Tasha could tell by her tilted head and the furrow between her eyes that she probably just as nervous as she was. Great. That didn’t exactly lessen her fear of what happened last night. 

Suddenly, Patterson rushed forward and threw her arms around the shorter women, her embrace nearly crushing her. 

”Tasha, I was so worried about you” she mumbled into Tasha’s hair. ”Don’t scare me like that again”

”I will try not to” she breathed in the familiar scent of the blondes perfume. It felt like home. 

Silence fell over them once again as they remained in the embrace. That was until a loud growl escaped from Tasha’s stomach. They pulled apart and Tasha let out a laugh. Patterson followed suit and Tasha could feel those damn butterflies again. 

”You brought breakfast, right?”

”Oh, yes of course!” Patterson held out a big brown paper bag and started unpacking it items. ”I wasn’t sure what you were in mood for, so I got pancakes, waffles, some eggs and bacon, that banana muffin I can’t believe you find even edible, there’s croissants and coffee of course” she rambled while Tasha watched in shock at the amount of food. ”Ah, and a vanilla yoghurt, but that’s mine so you can’t have it”

”Patterson, you do realize that there’s only the two of us here?” she chuckled and shook her head. 

”Well, yes. But.. uhm” the blonde blushed and started fidgeting with the wrapper of the muffin. ”It’s too much isn’t it? I just wanted to make sure to bring whatever you would be in the mood for.   
I didn’t-” 

”Thank you, Patterson. It’s perfect.” Tasha interrupted her. She couldn’t help but smile at the blush on her face. Bringing that much food was such a Patterson thing to do and it certainly was one the things she loved about her friend. 

They settled down in the living room, on each end of the couch with a blanket sprawled across their legs. A movie was playing in the background while the two women were engaged in a discussion about this week’s hottest gossip at the office which, to no one’s surprise were about Rich and his latest attempt at getting Boston Arliss Crab back. The tension caused by last nights events now seemed distanced and both of them seemed to finally be able relax in each others company again. 

Suddenly, the sound of Tasha’s phone interrupted them. She reached for it and read the message. 

 

(11:02 AM) Edgar Reade

So what did you think of Hannah, Girlfriend material? She seemed into you! 

”Shit” 

”What is it?” Patterson asked with a curious look on her face. 

”It’s Reade. He asked what I..” she hesitated for a second. ”What I thought about Hannah, the girl they tried to set me up with last night” she looked down at her phone again, avoiding the pair of eyes she could feel rest on her. 

Patterson’s face fell. ”Well, what did you think of her?”

She shrugged. ”I don’t know, to be honest, I just don’t think she’s my type. I didn’t feel like there was any connection between us you know” 

Thinking about it. Hannah was literally everything that Patterson wasn’t. Hannah had dark hair. She was really short. She was a sports fan. A dog person. Would rather choose tea over coffee. Ideal Friday night is going out clubbing. She was as far away from everything Tasha never knew she looked for in a person. A few years ago, she would’ve dreamt of dating a soccer player but right now, she couldn’t think of anything more attractive than a blonde, nerdy board game role player. How the hell did that happen. 

In an attempt to joke and lighten up the mode again, she then added with a chuckle ”not that I remember that much besides like the first two rounds of drinks” 

Patterson attempted to put on a forced smile. ”Yeah about that, Tasha. Do you remember what we talked about last night?” 

Tasha froze. She wasn’t ready for the execution of what might come. Based on Patterson’s not very amused expression she feared the worst. And the worst in this case was her drunken ass admitting her feelings for the blonde who did not feel the same way and now was here to remind her that she was her best friend and she was straight and that they from now on would pretend that last night never happened. 

She just shook her head, to stressed out by trying to prepare some kind of excuse or forgiveness speech. Patterson kept her gaze on her while she kept fiddling with her hands, which Tasha knew was a sign that even the blonde was nervous. ”Well, I don’t know how to this, but I think there is some stuff that we should talk about”

Oh boy. There it was. Maybe she should just spare Patterson the burden of having to hurt and humiliate her by just confessing and apologizing right here and now. That would probably be the mature thing to do. 

”Okay, before that. I just want to say something” Patterson looked at her with puzzled eyes. Tasha sat up straight in the sofa and now faced the other woman properly. 

”First of all I want to apologize for what I said last night, even though I still can’t remember it I bet it can’t be good. And second, I want to apologize because if I did tell you what I think I did, it’s true.”

”Tasha..” 

”No, wait. Hear me out” she put her hand up to make her statement clear and Patterson nodded slightly, lips pursed. ”I can’t hold it in anymore. I- I really..” she took a deep breath. ”You mean so much to me, Patterson. And I don’t want to ruin anything between us because you’re my best friend and honestly, I don’t know what I would do without you.” her voiced cracked a little and at that, Patterson reached over to grab her hand, carefully lacing their fingers together. She patiently waited for Tasha to continue, even if all she wanted was to let her know that she felt the same way.

”Because you are the smartest person I know, not only because you are insanely good at your job, which you by the way should get way more appreciation for, but your mind is simply incredible. I could sit and listen to you talk about molecules and atoms and it would suddenly seem interesting and fascinating and finally makes sense. In a room full of people you stand out, because you outshine anyone. You attract people, not just because of your looks, and god, you’re beautiful Patterson. But because your positive energy and your often very bad jokes just makes people want to be close to you. It makes me want to be close to you. You’re inspiring in so many ways. And I guess that somewhere along the line, I fell for you.”

She hesitated, then finally had the courage to look up and face the blonde. She had tears in her eyes and Tasha felt her heart clench at the sight. Fuck. She still held on to the other woman’s hand and softly rubbed her thumb in circles against the back of her hand. 

”Patterson.. I’m sorry-” 

Tasha didn’t have time to finish her sentence before Patterson, who sometime during her confession had moved closer to her, now spoke up. ”Stop, Tasha.” Their knees were now barely touching. With panic and anxiety controlling her body, Tasha neglected what Patterson just said. ”No seriously, I’m really sorry for putting you in this situation-” 

Patterson had had enough. She reached forward to cup her cheek with her free hand, carefully stroking her jawbone. ”Please, don’t say anything more” she whispered, their bodies now close enough for the words to be heard. Tasha was sure that the blonde could hear her heart pounding loudly in her chest. And without another word, the blonde slowly leaned forward until their noses lightly bumped against each other. Both their breaths were shaking and Tasha was too scared to move. They stayed like this for what felt like forever but probably were less than a few seconds before the blonde finally closed the gap between them. It was careful and sweet, their lips barely brushed. It took the brunette a moment to realize what happened before she finally returned the kiss.

The kiss was soft and slow, neither of them rushing anything but rather taking their time to explore this new sate of their relationship. The blonde tasted like vanilla and coffee and home. Her hand found it’s way to Patterson’s hip where it rested before she found herself tugging on her shirt in an attempt to lessen the space between them.

When they parted, they rested their foreheads against each other. Their breaths uneven and cheeks flushed. Patterson reached out to put a strand of dark hair behind Tasha’s ear when she suddenly started to giggle. Tasha leaned back to face the blonde and was met with a smirk.

”Nice shirt you got there”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading :)


End file.
